New Release + Review | The Chronicles of Larry: Season One

The book definitely NOT written by Sloane Howell and his seester…
The book your mother would NOT want you to read…
99 Cents on Amazon and FREE with Kindle Unlimited
Created by: Seymour Snatch and Seester McSeesterson
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“This book made me want to expel my lunch, and should never have been penned.” – Honore de Ballsack

“The Chronicles of Larry is a juvenile telling of a vile creature that never met an object at which he wouldn’t shake his testicles.” – Vladimir Grabacock


Allegedly based on a true story (this cannot be confirmed nor denied)…

Many moons ago in a seedy alley that cut through the heart of Toledo, Ohio, Seester McSeesterson and Seymour Snatch stumbled on their way to a hotel room from an evening of drunken debauchery. In that moment, Seester noticed a leather bound journal illuminated by the bright moonlight next to a dumpster.

She never knew that when she opened it their lives would be forever changed. Contained therein was a journal of a man named Larry. For hours they poured over tale after tale of revenge of the highest order, the ultimate in chicanery, and lived out a romance for the ages, coupled with the most electrifying profane lexicon either of them had ever bore witness to.

They searched for years trying to locate this rockstar of revenge and purveyor of profanity, only to come up empty in every search. Soon after, they decided it would be selfish to keep to themselves this epic saga of one man’s transformation from every day office drone to freedom and f*ckery. So they transcribed his journal in order to release it to the world.


You should NOT read this book. This book contains the most offensive stories of all time and should be banned worldwide. Seymour and Seester are not responsible for any material contained herein and are merely vessels transporting these stories to the masses. Please proceed with extreme caution. You have been warned.


When Seymour is not writing stories of c*nt f*cking and debauchery he enjoys growing jalapeno peppers in the shapes of dicks. He has also mastered the craft of urinating from towering heights. Nicknamed Niagara Balls as a child, his most recent exploit was pissing from the observation deck of the Burj Khalifa in Dubai where he was dubbed the “Sultan of Streams” by the local natives.
When not acting as a master wordsmith with Snatch, McSeesterson enjoys farting up local eateries and leaving gratuities that only contain the number nine. When asked about her favorite activities McSeesterson has been quoted as saying, “Watching someone eat a crop dusted cobb salad…” is something that she “enjoys immensely…” She has also described a good fart as “Eerily similar to a three act play structure…” which has made her “More cognizant as an author with regards to timing and pacing…”


WHAT THE WHAT! Larry is my spirit animal. Seriously, can you imagine what the world would be like if we all went around like Larry. I freaking love him. Take heed in the warning, they are not joking. The language is foul and over the top. I think I may have learned a few (or ten) new insults.

Larryballs keeps a journal of his daily occurrences. It’s got to be one of the most entertaining things I’ve ever read. I mean, he calls his girl child satan and the boy is OCD and likes to be called nine. Good stuff.

His wife if you want to call her that is a good for nothing ho bag. Their marriage isn’t exactly traditional or happy or anything else remotely normal. So when a pretty little thing, who just happens to be Larry’s boss’s daughter stumbles into his office it’s no surprise she’s the highlight of his day. Jane. I was rooting, SHOUTING, begging Larry to please divorce his wife. But no, Larry is lazy and divorce = paperwork.

So even though Larryballs is rude and crude, Jane brings out a different side to him. She makes him happy. They have to tread lightly here because he is married after all. But what will one “non date” turn into?! I can’t wait to find out!


My rating 5/5 stars

*I received an ARC in exchange for an honest review.


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